Tonight has just been another one of those nights when I am again reminded of what I don't have.
It's not fun, just so you know. Not even a little. And when I get in this mindset it's hard to focus on what I DO have (mainly because if I had someone special in my life to share it with it would be that much better)
the Holy Spirit always reminds me of the Letter to the Exiles, a letter that resonates with me.
You probably know it as "For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord...." but I know it as SO much more.
"This is what the LORD Almighty, the God of Israel, says to all those I carried into exile from Jerusalem to Babylon: “Build houses and settle down; plant gardens and eat what they produce. Marry and have sons and daughters; find wives for your sons and give your daughters in marriage, so that they too may have sons and daughters. Increase in number there; do not decrease. Also, seek the peace and prosperity of the city to which I have carried you into exile. Pray to the LORD for it, because if it prospers, you too will prosper.” Yes, this is what the LORD Almighty, the God of Israel, says: “Do not let the prophets and diviners among you deceive you. Do not listen to the dreams you encourage them to have. They are prophesying lies to you in my name. I have not sent them,” declares the LORD. This is what the LORD says: “When seventy years are completed for Babylon, I will come to you and fulfill my good promise to bring you back to this place. For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you,” declares the LORD, “and will bring you back from captivity. I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you,” declares the LORD, “and will bring you back to the place from which I carried you into exile.” Jeremiah 29:4-15
But God had other plans. God WANTED them in exile, the exile into which he carried them. He asks them to pray for and seek peace and prosperity which to me implies a significant lack in such things.
But the bedrock of the truth is TRUST. He wants them to trust Him with their lives. He knows what he's doing, he knows the effect it will have. God has me where he wants me. I'm perfectly placed. I may not do what he wants all the time (or most of the time) but he still uses me in ways I don't even see. My station in life (and love life) is what God wants.
AND...I'm done trying to find this "Mr. Right" We are not playing some big game of hide and seek. He has not entered my life yet and I'm thankful because although I may be in denial about it (and maybe him as well) I'm not ready or he's not ready. He's out there, i know this BUT I don't want him until he's ready for me. I don't want him until I'm perfect for him.